In which Jesus answered my prayer in the most surprising way.
I knew it seemed like a crazy request.
But, I prayed anyway. If I am honest, maybe it was selfish. Praying for my kids to be able to go on a cruise, in my mind, would mean we had the money to go.
My Prayer: Jesus, my kids want to go on a Disney cruise. Could you please help us be able to do that?
The scenery around this prayer: In April I started a business. Zero income. So, praying for a cruise seemed a bit ridiculous. But, my son asked me multiple times if we could go, so I prayed.
Jesus is always at work around us.
The first “answer” to this prayer was in my heart. I was in a Bible study on Paul Miller’s The Praying Life book. In the book, one of the ways they encouraged us to pray is like a child. So, I decided I would do just that. I told Jesus I knew the prayer seemed silly since I was starting a business, but I wanted to ask Him, as my Dad, anyway.
I prayed from about June or July until November – just Jesus and me.
In November, a friend asked me what I was praying for. I told her I knew it was silly but that I was praying for the kids to go on a cruise. At this time, we had still made no money in the business due to shipping delays of our product from China. So, even voicing the prayer seemed quite silly.
A couple of weeks later, my friend called. She told me that she had joined me in praying and that every time she did she felt like she was being told to give me money to go on the cruise. I am really not sure that I can even express with words my emotions and shock in that moment.
I would love to tell you the story ended there. But I have found that rarely are my prayers just about what I ask. Jesus is always working inside of me. This was no exception.
You would expect that the story ended there. Happily ever after we went on a cruise… So, that’s not exactly what happened.
My initial reaction was shock and gratefulness. Hours later, I was like there is no way I am going to accept this crazy of a gift. This was the first place where Jesus had to deal with my heart. Had I prayed expecting an answer? Why was I shocked when He answered my prayer? I had to get honest with Jesus. Yes, I was shocked – maybe because He answered my prayer but DEFINITELY because He didn’t answer it the way I thought He would. I realized that my prayer had been a bit more selfish than I would have told you at the beginning. You see – I expected Jesus to answer my prayer by making my business profitable enough that our family could afford a cruise. I struggled, a lot, with the fact that the answer would require me to accept an insanely kind gift from someone else. This struggle led me to repenting from independence, pride, and my fear of allowing someone else to give me a good gift. These are things that I struggle to surrender in my walk with Jesus also. Repentance and honesty about my heart were important gifts that Jesus gave me when He answered my prayer request. It was never just about a cruise.
